From the columist who always looks on the bright side of life
You're all so busy these days with college, work, driving around smoking spliffs and such that you always miss out on the news. So VivaLaPablo in association with JustDonal inc and SuckMyFanny productions present the What's goin' on in the World?
Heil Catriona!
It's resident skank Catriona's birthday today, she turns 20. So with her possibly becoming a proper solicitor in about 6 years it gives all working class people 6 years to get out of the country before she prosecutes you for existing.
Basically Brian re-learning to talk
Still heroically recovering from getting happy slapped by Rupert Murdoch over his constant complaints to Sky News, Basically Brian has started speaking again. VivaLaPablo has harshly criticised him though saying the few words he can say are far too patriotic.
Strictly Jonathan in awards shame
After all the glitz and glamour from Sunday night's awards ceremony....'The JustDonal inc Column of the Week award' sponsored by Nivea Visage, winner Jonathan is in the tabloid turmoil. He reportedly forget to thank his girlfriend upon recieving the award....Wait did you say girlfriend?
Controversial.
Column Study Found
A study carried out by Yale University has found that children who read JustDonal do not develop behaviour problems in school, that's probably because most teachers are more interesting than Donal's columns.
Controversial #2.
Rape Report Found
A new report has stated that woman gets raped every 26 seconds in South Africa, Jesus, you think she'd move!
Colour of skin?
Ali says she does find out hard to go out with a white guy. She went on to say she has trouble liking Michael Jackson since he went white.
Awards cermony a huge success
The JustDonal 'Column of the Week awards' was a huge draw last week. The ceremony's entertainment was booked by JustDonal himself so the show was sub - titled 'Best of Gay Europop #2'.
Top Ten Ways for Catriona celebrated her birthdays of the past
10. Drank too much beer, passed out under Shambo
9. A lively game of 'Dodge the urge to get a proper job'
8. Instead of hard drugs, had some hard cock
7. Enjoyed an enthusiastic rendition of 'Happy Knob - day to you'
6. Was horrified to see JustDonal as her male stripper
5. Thanked her uncle for the €40 voucher to Ann Summers
4. Hired clowns to twist balloons into the shape of working class people so she could kill them with a hat pin
3. Held an intimate gathering for her friends who havne't boned her yet
2. Gave Jonathan €50 and demanded he show her the full monty
1. Tequila shots with Attila the Hun
Quote of the week - "Patriotism is the conviction that you're country is superior to all others because you happened to have been born there" - George Bernard Shaw
Heil Catriona!
It's resident skank Catriona's birthday today, she turns 20. So with her possibly becoming a proper solicitor in about 6 years it gives all working class people 6 years to get out of the country before she prosecutes you for existing.
Basically Brian re-learning to talk
Still heroically recovering from getting happy slapped by Rupert Murdoch over his constant complaints to Sky News, Basically Brian has started speaking again. VivaLaPablo has harshly criticised him though saying the few words he can say are far too patriotic.
Strictly Jonathan in awards shame
After all the glitz and glamour from Sunday night's awards ceremony....'The JustDonal inc Column of the Week award' sponsored by Nivea Visage, winner Jonathan is in the tabloid turmoil. He reportedly forget to thank his girlfriend upon recieving the award....Wait did you say girlfriend?
Controversial.
Column Study Found
A study carried out by Yale University has found that children who read JustDonal do not develop behaviour problems in school, that's probably because most teachers are more interesting than Donal's columns.
Controversial #2.
Rape Report Found
A new report has stated that woman gets raped every 26 seconds in South Africa, Jesus, you think she'd move!
Colour of skin?
Ali says she does find out hard to go out with a white guy. She went on to say she has trouble liking Michael Jackson since he went white.
Awards cermony a huge success
The JustDonal 'Column of the Week awards' was a huge draw last week. The ceremony's entertainment was booked by JustDonal himself so the show was sub - titled 'Best of Gay Europop #2'.
Top Ten Ways for Catriona celebrated her birthdays of the past
10. Drank too much beer, passed out under Shambo
9. A lively game of 'Dodge the urge to get a proper job'
8. Instead of hard drugs, had some hard cock
7. Enjoyed an enthusiastic rendition of 'Happy Knob - day to you'
6. Was horrified to see JustDonal as her male stripper
5. Thanked her uncle for the €40 voucher to Ann Summers
4. Hired clowns to twist balloons into the shape of working class people so she could kill them with a hat pin
3. Held an intimate gathering for her friends who havne't boned her yet
2. Gave Jonathan €50 and demanded he show her the full monty
1. Tequila shots with Attila the Hun
Quote of the week - "Patriotism is the conviction that you're country is superior to all others because you happened to have been born there" - George Bernard Shaw
posted by Just Donal at 1:43 AM
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